I think 1 year ago was the hardest realization and decision that I ever had to make.
I had to fight everything that I thought I wanted because it wasn't what was right for me
It takes me a year to see it now and although I wish it'd make sense sooner, the lesson is learned regardless
I don't want to settle for being treated a basic human being, I don't want to idolize something we all deserve
I want to be treated like I have something to say and that what I have to say is important, it is important for me to be listened to
I want to be a person who doesn't interrupt someone with my own story, I don't know how to stop doing that sometimes because I've done that to make sure that conversations would continue until I realized that I had lost my privacy, I lost my boundaries somewhere between trying to be me and trying to be a version of me people enjoyed listening to or would want to talk to. I don't like that version of me any more because I am more than my relationship prospects, I am more than who i am and what I do with my romantic interest. I am an interesting person without them and I need to be that person doing all those things she's always wanted to do and not just the person who thinks ahead and only ahead. My time to enjoy my life is now, I didn't have that opportunity years ago but I have it now. The woman I am is going to give up on waiting she's gonna try things, just to say that she's tried them because she's young and won't be afraid because afraid and anxiety will not stop me from being her because my internal strength is louder than ever and if it has to scream, it will do so with no boundaries.
